Kasia Patzelt, like I said, I think I can infer what your answer to the question "What have I been doing wrong?" MIGHT be.

But I'm not entirely certain of the answer because you didn't definitively answer it. In your piece the question, I think, can be answered in one of two ways, either the answer is 'What I have been doing wrong is that I haven't embraced my yes, til now'' OR the answer is 'I have done not a damn thing wrong, so I'm going to embrace my yes and get on with life.' I get a stronger vibe on the latter, but without you circling back to the question you asked at the beginning it's not clear. I think, just as a matter of writing, any question you ask must be restated and definitively answered. It's like Chekhov's gun.

Your headline and subtitle drew me in because I've been pondering questions of this sort recently and am fascinated by a certain kind of self-abnegating perspective we often take of ourselves. For more, if you care to, see https://medium.com/the-innovation/the-riddle-of-the-self-help-stigmata-5271a7a67630